"I Shot Six. And they died."
"I killed six people."
"You didn't kill anyone..."
"I shot six people."
"No you haven't... how could you, you're just a voice in my head..."
"I shot - and killed - six people."
"Actually, you're not even a voice. You're just a... an... uhh... I'm not sure what you are. There's no voice to you. You're just..."
"I shot six. Random. Six I say. And they died."
"You're just a... a... thought. Yes, that's it! Just a thought. In my head. You have no embodiment or personality."
"No matter. I shot six. You know it that. I ... you ... we ... shot six."
"And they died."
The words seem to leap from his fingers and onto the computer screen, fingers flying over the keyboard as if possessed. The same words that were in his head - where no one but he knew about them - were now displayed on the screen as quickly as he could type.
"I shot six people. Shot them. I did it because the thought in my head said I would. I know I shouldn't but I couldn't get the thought to shut up and go away until I actually did it. I know how the these things work. I've been there before.
So I shot them . . . and now I must . . .
Yes, six people were shot, but...
The coffee pot was almost empty again as he poured himself another cup and he contemplated making another pot. But that have been his third full pot and already his heart was thrumming. He was painfully aware of it in his chest and more coffee would undoubtedly cause it to totally exit the small space the heart occupied.
He sat and read the words on the display, absently sipping cold coffee. When the cup was empty he took it and empty pot across the bare floor of the hotel room to the small sink in the bathroom. He refilled the old coffee maker with water from the dripping tub faucet and using the same coffee grounds that were used for the last two pots, pressed the ON button.
He padded silently back to the chair and sat heavily back into the chair. It accepted the shape of his body like an old friend. He sighed and placed his hands on the worn keys. Without any encouragement, they began to move, pressing keys as they did and words once again began to appear on the monitor.
********************************************************
I didn't shoot them in the head. Oh, no. And I didn't shoot them dead. I certainly didn't shoot them alive. But I did shoot them. All Six. Strangers. Each one alone. All unknown.
Man.
Woman.
Girl.
Boy.
It didn't matter. What mattered was that I shoot six people.
So I did.
Finally.
And the THOUGHT will be quieted.
Perhaps.
He read the last sentence as it appeared and knew it was a lie. The THOUGHT wouldn't be quieted by simply typing the words. They needed to be published. And in a forum that would promise the widest distribution. One were millions could read them. The web would be were they would be published. Only the vastness of the internet would provide the necessary relief he sought. The THOUGHT sought. His fingers continued to dance over the keyboard.
It said I shot six people - and admit it.
So I did. And I am.
It didn't say how I would shoot those six people.
So I did it . .
with . . .
. . . a . . .
. . .
He stopped typing as read the words on the screen. Yes, he thought, that is exactly how it happened. I shot six people just as that THOUGHT in his head said I would. But I cheated.
And now . . . now . . .
. . . it knows.
. . . and I must pay.
